Fact checking in the real world--why authors can't ever really leave work behind

I've been vacationing in Oregon and Utah, both of which have way better weather than Arizona has right now. I didn't mean to work at all, but the problem (or benefit, depending on how you look at it) is that you can't turn off the writer's brain. For example, when we went white water rafting, we took a 15 passenger van to the river head. The whole ride up I was thinking about the fifteen passenger van I have my characters riding around in during Slayers. (That may or may not be the actual title of the book.)

Actual example of the conversation in the van:

Youngest daughter (code name, Melody, because she has recently informed me that I should have named her Melody.) "Mom, look at how tall those trees are!"
Me: silently thinking, "My characters need a bigger van. There's not enough room for surveillance equipment in this thing."

Here are some pictures from our water adventure. Although I look like I'm standing up in the back of the raft, I'm not. The water is simply higher where I am.

In this next picture you will notice I have disappeared. Coincidence, or a plot by our evil raft guide? My question is this: Who in the world first saw a churning river with rapids quaintly named things like "Bone Crusher" and thought, "Hey, I have a good idea! Let's get a flimsy, air-filled boat, and go down this baby."

Who? Men, that's who.


In Slayers, my main character rides a black gelding named Bane. That's what the stables gave me. Unlike my main character, I had no mystic connection with my black horse. However, he did want to eat non-stop, so maybe there were similarities in our personalities. That's pretty much what I did on vacation.


Next stop, The Princess Festival in Lindon,Utah. Think Prom for little girls. Here is Melody riding a sea serpent. Hmmm, that would make an interesting plot point . . .

Here I am posing in a fountain with Melody. This picture actually has nothing to do with the rest of the blog. I'm just including it because I'm vain. I think most authors are. Why else would we ever think that anybody cared, let alone would pay for, all the stories that go swirling around in our minds? (Discuss amongst yourselves.)


Here is Melody with Beauty. All of the famous princesses were at the festival. (Which incidentally is a volunteer run fundraiser to help girls in Kenya.)The princesses had to have generic names though, so Disney won't sue them.

Here is the best princess of all: The Snow Queen, played by none other than big sister, code name Serena. Hey Serena, I knew that pale skin I gave you would pay off someday!

And lastly, here is Melody learning early on that to find your prince, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs.

I love princesses. I totally want to write that retelling of Cinderella that I've been thinking about since I wrote My Fair Godmother. Oh yeah, I'm supposed to be doing revisions. Cinderella will have to wait.

And the winner is . . .

First off, I feel compelled to tell you the show I would have snuck onto. Battlestar Gallactica. Captain Apollo . . . long heavy sigh . . . and Dirk Benedict . . . more sighing. True, the show had that stupid robot dog and sometimes the dialogue was cheesy, but hot guys make up for a lot.

Anyway, now that I have traveled down memory lane, you can read about the winner. Random.org, in all its random glory has chosen Karen Adair. So Karen, send me your regular address at jrallisonfans at yahoo dot com and I'll send your nuclear summer version book off to you.

Anyone else who wants another chance to win, GoodReads.com will be giving away a copy of Just One Wish from June 25-July 25. In fact, I think they've also got a copy of My Double Life they're giving away too.

Just One Wish give-away (The nuclear summer version)

I have bemoaned before the utter lack of influence I have over my covers. In fact, it seems like the fastest way for a cover to get scrapped is if I say, "I love it!" Apparently my publishers think I have no taste (my children think the same thing) so if I approve of something it is a sure sign to them that it needs to be changed.

Alas, I loved the Just One Wish cover. And in my defense, I was not alone. It won the best YA cover award on one blog.

But my publisher has changed it despite my protests. They have pink-ified it. Yep, the beautiful blue background is gone and now it looks like that sunny day has been turned into some bizarre nuclear holocaust.

Still, in order to celebrate the paperback edition, I'm doing a give-away. In the book, Annika goes to Hollywood in order to find and bring back a famous TV star to meet her six-year-old brother, before he has dangerous surgery. During the course of her quest, she pretends to be an extra on the TV star's show and is actually recruited into a scene.

If you could sneak onto any TV show--still running or already cancelled--which one would it be? Leave your answer in the comment box and if you're a follower, mention it since followers get double chances.

Cheers! (That was a salutation and not my TV series of choice. Oh, oh, triple chances if you can guess which TV series I would choose.)

Morals and values in YA lit, or Janette should really get more sleep before she opens her mouth

A couple of weeks ago, my friend (and super author) Shannon Hale asked for my opinion on a blog she was doing on morals and values in young adult books. Shannon, like a lot of authors, says she doesn’t think about morals or values as she writes. She just tells the story and lets people draw their own conclusions about it.

I typed out my opinion and sent it to her--although I wrote the email during a long stint of not-getting-much-sleep, and on that particular night I was up for 28 hours straight. The result is that my answer came off much harsher than I intended and it sort of sounded like I’m telling a lot of authors that they’re going straight to h*ll. With no stops along the way.

Yeah. Sorry about that to all of you authors I may have offended and will subsequently end up sitting next to at upcoming book conferences.

You can see the whole discussion over at: http://oinks.squeetus.com/2010/06/morals-and-values-and-lessons-oh-my.html

But basically my quote was something along the lines of: It’s irresponsible for YA authors to write about teen characters having sex when they make it seem like no bad consequences will happen. It’s tantamount to encouraging fourteen-year-olds to throw their lives away, and you’re all going to h*ll!!

Okay, maybe that wasn’t the exact quote, because I went on for several paragraphs, however you get the idea.

But here’s why it’s such an issue for me. About nine years ago while I was doing research for my book, What the Doctor Ordered, I had a scene where my doctor character counseled a pregnant teen. He told her she needed to get tested for sexually transmitted diseases, so I wanted him to throw out some statistics about STDs. I went on the internet to research STDs but I couldn’t believe the numbers. They were too high. Fifty percent of people have the HPV virus that causes genital warts and several kinds of cancer? One in six people have herpes? Surely not. More people would be talking about STDs if they were that big of a problem.

I called two STD hotlines and both times was told that 80% of sexually active people older than 14 years-old have some kind of STD. I still didn’t believe it so I called my gynecologist and asked him. He confirmed the numbers.

I was completely shocked. I still am. It’s a huge elephant in the room that nobody is mentioning.

Here’s another cheery statistic for you. I have a friend who works for a drug company and he’s traveled to Africa several times to work with doctors on their HIV medicine. According to him, in more than one country, one out of every five people are infected with HIV. One out of five! Think of the people who live on your street or the kids in your children’s school. Can you imagine if one out of every five of them had an incurable deadly disease?

Are we here in the USA smarter? Are we safer? Not according to one website I saw that said 50% of teens who have sex don’t use condoms.

And here are a few more facts kids should know before they make life changing decisions: Several STDs are incurable, many are painful, some aren’t prevented by using condoms, and more than one can kill you.

According to The Center for Disease Control approximately 19 million new STDs occur each year— almost half of them among young people 15 to 24 years of age.

The most reported diseases in the country every year are Chlamydia and Gonorrhea. Women/girls are particularly at risk because women don’t get symptoms from these diseases but both can result in infertility if left untreated.

As an added bonus, Gonorrhea—which has the highest reported rates of infection among teenagers and young adults—can cause pelvic inflammatory disease. About one million women in the United States develop PID each year. Look forward to abdominal pain, fever, and internal pus-filled “pockets” that are hard to cure and long-lasting.

Not fun enough? If you get syphilis, which can also go for years without detection, it can damage your internal organs, including the brain, nerves, eyes, heart, blood vessels, liver, bones, and joints. Signs and symptoms of the late stage of syphilis include difficulty coordinating muscle movements, paralysis, numbness, gradual blindness, dementia, and death.

Well that’s certainly worth contracting if the guy is dreamy enough.

I could go on, but I won’t. If you’re interested in more fun facts, you can go to the CDC website at: http://www.cdc.gov/std/default.htm

In truth, I don’t think my fellow authors realize what a serious and devastating problem all of this is. I think they would be more hesitant to put sex scenes in their YA books if they did. Of course, I’ve done my part to solve the problem. I told all of the authors that read Shannon Hale’s blog that they’re going to h*ll.

I’m just really caring and tactful that way.

My Unfair Godmother--weigh in on the cover

As my entripid followers know, one of the books I've been working on recently is the sequel to My Fair Godmother. I thought I'd unveil the cover. (Release date: JanuFebuaryish 2011)

Cool, huh? It was so considerate of Istock.com to shoot three different pictures of the same girl as a fairy so I could have some consistancy on my covers. (Sort of makes me feel like I have to write a third one, just so I can use that third picture.) I'm just hoping that the covers aren't so similar that people think it's the same book. (As in, oh, I already read that one. No need to buy it.)

The odd thing is that they sent me the cover on the 13th and I just signed the contract for the book today. When I saw the golden apple on the cover I thought, "Hmmm, People will wonder why that's there." So I had to go write a golden apple into the story. Hey, whatever works.

And the winner is . . .

Today the random number generator has chosen Kayla. So send me your address at jrallisonans at yahoo dot com and I'll send your book.

And for the rest of you, never fear. I'm sure I'll be giving away more books soon. What would a week be without a trip to the post office, where the postman all think I'm a little bit odd? (They're right.)

My Double Life Give Away

Andie, my intrepid rent-a-teenager, has come up with a book trailer for My Double Life. She did an awesome job, and special thanks to Arizona's own Jonnie and Brookie for letting me use their song: Missing Me Crazy. The first time I heard it, I knew I wanted it for the trailer because the chorus: You'd be missing me crazy if you only knew my name, fits so well with the novel.

For a chance to win the book, just watch the trailer and leave a comment about your favorite part. Followers get double chances, with the almighty Random Number Generator, so if you follow, follow me (sung to the tune of: Do As I'm Doing) be sure to let me know.

The Red Carpet launch

In case you missed the big event of the year, I had a fab red carpet launch at Changing Hands. This is the dress I picked up at thrift store when I realized . . . Oh, red carpet means I have to dress up too.

These next pictures are of me and my entourage arriving. Curse the paparazzi! They make my life a living heck!

Okay, that's actually just my fantasy world. Hey, authors are allowed to have fantasy worlds. We even populate them and get attached to our characters. (Tristan is real! I know he is!)

Here we are posing for our adoring crowds. And yes, that is the Book Babe Faith, along with the lovely Babe Brandi and Babe Bethany. (We are all Babes.)

We took lots of awesome pictures of people posing for the paparazzi--and I will say that some of my friends and their kids are quite the hams, but since I wasn't sure if any of them actually wanted their pictures posted on my blog, I'm just posting a couple from a woman who frequently trots her children's pictures out on this blog.

Yes, this is Gaston, and this is what he really would do if paparazzi ever bothered him. (Actually, he would probably grab cameras and clang them together like cymbals.)

And here is my biggest fan--or at least my most up-to-date fan-- since she reads all of my stories as I write them on my computer. Yesterday she asked me, "If you weren't an author, would you be one of those mothers that does housework?"

The world will never know.

And lastly, this was my favorite picture. Babe Brandi appears to be a mild mannered book store employee by day, but she obviously has an inner starlet that is dieing to get out.

Random.org has chosen the winner/ more chances

The random number generator--who boasts of true randomness (as opposed to all that fake randomness you find elsewhere) has chosen Enna Isilee as the winner.

If you feel lucky though, TeenLibris is giving five copies away at their site: www.teenlibris.com/win-me

Congrats, Enna. Send me your mailing address and I'll send you the book . . . well, actually, it may take me a day or two to send you the book because Putnam has still not sent me my author copies, something I am complaining bitterly about since I was supposed to get them last week. I bet Rick Riordan never has to wait for his author copies.

Hopefully they'll come today.

My Double Life giveaway

It is just two short days until My Double Life comes out, so I'll be running a couple of give-aways, but just because I'm putting up a new blog--you can't forget to come to my book launch on Thursday, May 13th at Changing Hands: 7:00 pm. Remember, you're going to lure strangers into your cars and bring them with you. (Details are in the last blog entry.)


Okay, so here's the deal for the free book. Teen Libris and fellow author, Susan Colbank, have interviews with me on their websites and I am just fascinating enough that you'll want to read them both. Then leave a comment on this blog about something you learned about me or the book from one of the interviews. Mention whether you're a follower, since followers get double entries. May the random number generator be with you!


http://www.teenlibris.com/interviews/detail/janette_rallison/


http://susancolebank.livejournal.com/

Red Carpet Book Launch--free stuff!

That sounds like I'm going to throw my book out the window, doesn't it? (Believe me, there were many days during revisions when I wanted to.) But no, I'm actually having a Red Carpet event at Changing Hands.

There will be free stuff: Books, a Changing Hands gift certificate, school visits--and you just might win some of it. I think it will be a lot of fun. Bring your daughters, your friends, complete strangers who you've lured into your car--and go as glam as you want, because we will be taking pictures in front of a 4x6 paparazzi poster.

Here's the info:
Thursday, May 13th at 7:00 pm.
Changing Hands Book Store
6428 S McClintock DriveTempe, AZ 85283(480) 730-0205

All her life, Alexia Garcia has been told she looks just like pop star Kari Kingsley, and one day when Alexia's photo filters through the Internet, she’s offered a job to be Kari's double. She takes the job in order to finally meet the father she's never known.

Alexia lives the celebrity life, even romancing the hottest lead singer on the charts. But is it real love if your boyfriend doesn't even know your name?

Just had to post this

And when I can figure out how to post the whole thing here, I will. But right now you're going to have to copy and paste the link because for some reason the whole thing isn't linking up.

http://www.raisingarizonakids.com/index.php?page=1.library.article_view&ar_id=1236

It is--get this--me in a cooking article. Those of you who know me are laughing right now--or as my husband put it when I told him Raising Arizona Kids was using me for their recipee section:

"So they're doing a humor piece?"

Yes, yes they are. But that's beside the point. It's me in a cooking article. Take that, Martha Stewart.

And the description winners are:

I have to say this was a really hard call. You guys wrote a ton of great description: delicious dips in his throat, muscles, cheesecake, sunlight tinging off his teeth, and Pluto the not-a-planet. I could go on, but you guys probably read the descriptions yourself.

The next time I have to describe an attractive person I will peruse through your comments looking for material. (I did warn you I would do that.) But the judges have spoken (At least one of them did--the other one's wife just had a baby so I'm cutting him some slack, but if he ever gets back to me there might be one more winner.)

Anyway, Jesslyn and Kimberly send me your mailing addresses at jrallisonfans at yahoo dot com and let me know which of my books you want. (With the exception of My Double Life--which still isn't out, but I'll do a giveaway for that book as soon as I get my author copies.)

(Wow, the parentheses are just flying in this post. It's obviously time for bed.)

The Whitney Awards

I bet you thought I was going to ask you to write more descriptions of these very stunning women. No, dear blog reader, actually this is a picture of Julie Wright and I at the Whitney Awards. By the way, I am actually wearing one of Julie's dresses because she has much better taste than I do. (I had planned on buying a dress while I was in Utah but somehow it never happened.)

I know I should tell you who the winners of the description contest are. I'm going to get to that soon--really. I've enlisted the help of two judges and they have yet to get back to me about their choices. (If you're reading this, judges,take this as a subtle hint.)

The reason it's been so long since I've written, is that I've spent the last week in Utah doing school visits, book signings, a writers conference, and the Whitney Awards. My Fair Godmother was up for the best YA novel.

Here is a picture of me after the awards:
You can probably tell from the number of chocolate deserts sitting in front of me that once again, I didn't win.

Here are some other losers after the awards:
At least I'm in good company. Jessica Day George, James Dashner, and Julie Wright are all awesome writers.

And here's what happens when you go for a week with very little sleep. I am leading a group of women in a rendition of Beyonce's Single Ladies.


Dan Wells, who won some award for something, said that all my blog readers would wonder what I was pointing at. He may have made that snarky comment because I commandeered a podcast interview and asked him some of my own questions. Well, what do you expect when you write a book called: I Am Not A Serial Killer? People are going to wonder about certain things. One of the questions I asked him was, "What are you not going to be next?"

According to Dan, he is not going to be a vampire next, but I guess we'll have to see. Personally, I think Dan sparkles. Just saying. Here is a picture of Dan and me. I ask you: Does this man look like a serial killer and should people really be giving him awards?

Oh, all right, I'll post a normal picture of Dan and I.


Next blog I'll post contest winners and more pictures of the conference.

Book Give-Away/ The problem with attractive people

I bet you think I'm going to say that the problem with attractive people is that they're conceited or used to privilege or they see the world differently from regular people. Probably true, but nope, that's not what this blog is about.

The problem with attractive people is that it is so hard to write interesting descriptions of them in books. When the heroine is describing the hero, (or the other way around) she needs to do it in a way that not only gives the reader a basic visual image, but also tells us he's attractive.

However, beyond writing about a few distinguishing characteristics--blond, brunette, square jaw, blue eyes or brown--you can't describe a person's face at all. People look vastly different from one another, but it's nearly impossible to detail those differences with words.

This makes describing a handsome guy or beautiful girl that much harder, and now that I'm revising book number 18, I feel like I've run out of fresh ways to do it. I want to write:

He had two eyes, a nose, and a mouth--and they were placed in just the right areas of his face.

You see my problem.

So here's the deal: Write a description of a handsome guy or a beautiful girl in the comment box. I don't care what color eyes, hair, or skin he or she has--I have a lot of beautiful people in my books. I'll get around to your favorite type eventually.

I may use all or part of your description at some point in one of my books. (Heck, I feel like there are so few ways to write up attractive people that I may have already used your description before you even write it.)

I'll choose two comments and those people can have whichever one of my books they want. (With the exception of My Double Life, which still isn't out yet--but hey, May 13 isn't that far away. Yay!)

Happy writing.

Speaking of Twilight . . .

Ben Bella Books emailed me to say that my Twilight essay from the book A NEW DAWN is up on their website this week. That means you can read what I have to think about it for FREE! (Of course you also do that here, but hey, on their website I'm not only witty, I'm grammatically correct! That, my friends, is what a copy editor will do for you.)

You can see it until midnight next Tuesday at:

http://www.smartpopbooks.com/

Just scroll down until you get to the link to my essay, To Bite, Or Not To Bite; That Is The Question (Yes, I know somewhere Shakespeare is cringing.)

Here's the first two paragraphs to tease you:

What’s your definition of a bad day? A fight with a friend? A speeding ticket? How about being attacked by a vampire and painfully turned into the undead, then realizing you must wander for eternity fighting off a craving to kill people? Yeah, that would pretty much be a bad day.

Carlisle, the leader of the Cullen clan of vampires had this bad day and (we can assume) many other bad days that followed. Stephenie Meyer doesn’t skimp when dishing out problems for her characters. Seriously, if you were Cinderella and could choose someone to be your fairy godmother, you wouldn’t want it to be Stephenie Meyer. Sure, she could come up with the ultimate Prince Charming to take you to the ball, but he might kill you afterward.

Too funny not to share

I laughed so hard when I watched this. I'm sure a lot of husbands can relate!

My Fair Godmother, German style

I just got the German version of My Fair Godmother. They changed the title, of course. (The play on words doesn’t work in other languages.) Their title is Real Fairies, False Princes, which I have to say, is one cool title. I totally wish I had thought of it, and I’m sad it won’t work for the sequel. (Sorry, no princes, but there is a single king.)

When I turned in My Fair Godmother to Walker it was 111,000 words--over 400 pages. They thought this was too long and wanted me to cut nearly a 100 pages out. They did have a point. It needed to be trimmed. I clearly learned my lesson because this time when I wrote the sequel it was only 103,000 words. Yeah, I know, the first revision request I’m expecting is that I cut the text down—which I’m dreading because I already cut 7,000 words from it before I sent it in.

Granting three wishes just takes some time.

Anyway, so the interesting thing about the German version of My Fair Godmother is that it is 419 pages long. I feel strangely vindicated by this fact. I also wonder what is in those extra pages. Is German like Russian and it takes them more syllables to say the same thing? Did the translator go into more depth explaining things? Maybe the romance scenes are more romantic. It makes me wish I spoke German.

In all fairness, the response.

My husband woke me up this morning and said, "Roger Responded."

My first thought was, "Why don't I know when to keep my mouth shut?" Followed quickly by thoughts of the conversation I would have to have with my editor about how I had managed to offend somebody else in the book world. Luckily, Roger was very nice, here is his response:

Thanks for coming by, Janette. I am not picking on your book in particular or on the genre of commercial fiction in general, either, just pointing out that our attitude towards it (as evinced by the comments that follow yours) differs from the way we regard similar books for adults. When you say your editor asked you to write it, do you mean that you were presented with a concept and asked to write a book that would fit? To me, that is definitionally commercial fiction. That's not to say it "needs to go out with the trash" and I'm not sure how Amber inferred that from what I wrote. I read and enjoy tons of commercial fiction (those who know me know I can quote entire passages verbatim from the complete works of Judith Krantz).

But I think librarians who believe that it doesn't matter what people read need to examine that credo closely. First: Really? It doesn't matter what people read? People read all the time on their computers; does that count? Or do you mean it doesn't matter what people read so long as they read books? Why are books special? And so on. My point is that most defenders of the innate value of reading "anything" are in fact far more particular in their definitions than they admit.

And why is reading, beyond the kind of functional reading people need to do to survive in contemporary society, good? Why is recreational reading better than watching TV or playing a game or whatever else a non-reader might prefer to do? Why is reading "something" better than reading nothing? Is "at least they're reading" truly a powerful defense of the practice?

Okay, Janette here again. So of course I couldn't keep my mouth shut after that post. (After all, he did ask me a question and getting-kids-to-read is one of my favorite soap boxes.) Here is my response (unabridged with typos included--why don't I catch those before I hit post?)

Hi Roger,
Putnam likes me to present them with a bunch of plot ideas I could turn into novels and then they choose which one I write. That way, if they already have a novel coming out about a girl who decides to climb Mt. Everest, I don’t inadvertently write another one. This last time I sent in many well thought out and meaningful plot outlines and I also sent in a one line idea: A girl who doubles for someone famous.

That’s the one they choose. I quickly realized it was a very narrow plot idea. For example, if you’re writing a romance about a girl who doubles for a rock star (and there’s very few jobs a teenager could have that she would be famous enough to need a double) there is really only one possibility of who she can fall in love with: another famous rock star. If she fell in love with some guy from the lighting crew there would be no danger for her character, and thus no tension. He wouldn’t care that she wasn’t famous. He might even be glad. Nope, it has to be someone way out of her league so she has something to lose if the truth comes out.

The more I plotted this story out, the more I realized the plot points had already been determined in those original seven words.

I didn’t want the book to just be about fame and money, so I choose a character who is looking for a father who doesn’t know she exists. Her job as a double allows her to meet him. In my mind the story is all about family and the desire kids have to be loved and accepted by their parents. But that doesn’t sound nearly as cool on a flap copy.

As for getting kids to read and what they should read, I could talk for an hour on that subject since I have two reluctant reader sons. Keep in mind that 1 in 5 children have a reading disability. I myself am dyslexic. (Thank goodness for spell check!) When my oldest son was in 4th grade his teacher came to me (after the school refused to get him extra reading help) and she told me, “I’ve seen this happen a thousand times. Kids struggle with reading, then they fall behind in school, then they hate school, then they get in trouble and drop out of school. If you don’t want that to happen, you need to get your son reading help.”

I homeschooled him for fifth grade so we could concentrate just on reading.

My Harvard educated father was aghast that I let my son read Calvin and Hobbes and counted it as reading time, but comic books are a great thing for reluctant readers. The pictures and punch lines keep the kids there reading, and while they’re doing that, they’re learning important reading skills like vocabulary and visualization techniques.

I went from disdaining Captain Underpants to getting every book in the series. And when my son stayed up until 3:00 a.m. in the morning to read The Lightening Thief, I decided that if I ever meet Rick Riordan I’m going to kiss him. A lot. Security will have to pull me away.

This same son is reading The Iliad now. (Okay, not willingly, but he’s still reading it.) My philosophy is that kids need to learn that reading is fun first. It’s not like calculus homework that very few people do for enjoyment. Once we’ve taught kids that reading is fun, we open up a world of possibilities to them. Until they think it’s fun. It might as well be calculus homework.

Again, thank you for the part you play in helping kids connect with books.

Cheers,
Janette

In which Horn Book disses commercial fiction and me by name

Okay, actually Horn Book only dissed the flap copy and premise of my book, which I don't feel too badly about since Tim, the Bow-Tied One, came up with both. And I rewrote the flap copy for the book and was surprised that the older version was on the ARCs. (Note to self, make sure it's not on the real books.)

But this is from the editor in chief at Horn Book's blog:

Not as rhetorical a question as you might have wished

From the promo blurb for My Double Life, by Janette Rallison:

You know how they say everyone has a twin somewhere in the world, a person chance has formed to be their mirror image? Well, mine happens to be rock star Kari Kingsley. How crazy is that?

Not crazy at all, when you, like I, have just spent two days combing through dozens (and dozens) of new YA novels, every other one of which seeming to encapsulate a formula of romance novel plus high-concept commercial hook plus glamorama cover art. In my day we called these paperbacks.

One of the more interesting of post-Harry Potter developments has been the emergence of commercial fiction for young people; that is, books designed to be purchased by kids/teens themselves, written in an undemanding style and with an alluring, quickly graspable premise. Airport books. Except if they were airport books, I wouldn't have to think twice about not reviewing them. And. There. Are. So. Many. And so many that seem to want desperately to be just like some other book that has already been a hit. Little Vampire Women, I'm looking at you.

Okay, now it's Janette typing again.

My first reaction when I read this was to laugh and go write Little Vampire Women. (You know somebody is going to do it, and it will be a bestseller.) But it did get me thinking about the whole issue. Then today I went back to reread the blog and noticed that somebody had left a scathing anonymous comment so I figured I had better leave a comment because otherwise everyone would think I was the anonymous commenter. Here is my comment:

Hi Roger,
To tell you the truth, when my editor asked me to write this book, I had some similar thoughts to yours and joked with him more than once that we should call the book: Yes, Hannah Montana Fans, This Book is for You!

But really, there are no new plots, just new characters to live in them. I asked myself what elements I could add to this much used Prince and the Pauper plot to make it meaningful. Trust me, the issues in the book do run deeper than the flap copy suggests.

As far as the benefits of commercial fiction go, I'll just say this: I've had teenagers tell me they didn't like reading until they started reading my books. I had two reluctant reader sons who learned that reading could be fun by reading Captain Underpants. Whatever works! Now they're reading the classics.

And thank you, Roger, for all you do to bring the wonderful world of reading to kids too!

Now I think I'll sit down and start writing that Little Vampire Women book you mentioned. It's going to be gold!

My Double Life from youngest daughter's point of view

My youngest daughter is still at that point where she reads with Mom and Dad listening to help her with the big words. While we were driving to visit cousins, I thought I would make good use of time and have her read to me from the beginning of the book. Here is the first paragraph of the book: (Which reminds me, as soon as I get someone to update my website, the first three chapters will be on my website along with extra scenes not in the book.)

I didn’t want to write this. Really, there’s a lot that’s happened in the last few months that I’d rather forget. But Mom says I need to have an autobiography on hand, that I need to record all the facts, in case someone writes a trashy tell-all book about me. Mom also told me I should describe her as ten pounds thinner, looking like a fashion model, and being an immaculate housekeeper. So here’s the disclaimer: Whatever else you might think about the events in this story, please keep in mind that my mom is gorgeous and our bathrooms were always clean.

My daughter read the first sentence, I didn’t want to write this, and asked, "Is this book about you?"

"No," I said. "In novels sometimes authors pretend to be the main character."

My daughter thought about this for a moment. "So you really did want to write this book?"

"No, actually I didn't want to write the book. It was my editor's idea. I wanted to write a fantasy book about wizards."

This seemed to just confuse my daughter about the whole real-not real aspect of the book. She read through the rest of the paragraph until she came to the last sentence: Whatever else you might think about the events in this story, please keep in mind that my mom is gorgeous and our bathrooms were always clean.
"Oh," she said, understanding dawning over her, "This book is pretend. Our bathrooms aren't always clean."

And that in a nutshell is the difference between fiction and nonfiction.

Tucson Book Festival March 13-14

If any of you are in the area, I hope you'll stop by and see me at the Tucson Book Festival so it looks like I have fans. (I like to pretend, often bribing near strangers into filling this role.)

My schedule for Saturday, March 13:

1:00-2:00 - Workshop on writing
2:00-2:30, autographing
4:00-4:30 - Teen Author Lounge

You can find out about the other 400 authors attending by checking out the website:
http://tucsonfestivalofbooks.org/

Hope to see you there!

Career Day

Yesterday my daughter told me her school was having a dress-in-the-career-you're going-to-have day. She couldn't decide whether to go as an artist, a crazy cat lady, or an editor.

"What do editors wear?" she asked.
"Bow ties," I said.
"What do the girl editors wear?" she asked.
"Probably business casual," I told her.
She wasn't thrilled with this answer. I have some of those outfits but she didn't want to go to school wearing my "old lady" clothes. "No one will know what I'm supposed to be," she said.

I thought up the perfect solution for her. She went to school with a red pen tucked behind her ear(I told her to use it liberally)and a stack of rejection letters to hand out.

"You don't have to wait for people to submit to you," I said, "just go up and tell random people that you think they have no talent."

Here is what her rejection letter said:

Dear Hopeful Writer,
Thank you for letting us consider your manuscript. After careful deliberation (we looked at it for several seconds) we have decided that your work doesn’t meet our stringent standards. (We all laughed ourselves silly.) We wish you all the best in your writing career. (Give up now and get a job at Burger King.)

Sincerely,
The editor

When my daughter came home from school, I asked her if she handed out all the rejection slips.

"Yeah," she said. "And I wished I'd brought more to give out."

Yep, she nailed being an editor.

Random.org has chosen the winner

I love the Random.org website because it boasts that it is truly random. As opposed to all those other things in life that are only pseudo-random. (Like, say, certain people's editorial comments.) The first sentence on the site says:

Perhaps you have wondered how predictable machines like computers can generate randomness.

Actually, no, I have never wondered that. I generally take randomness for granted.

But not today when I need a number. And today the random number generator chose Brenda as the winner.

You know the drill, Brenda. Send me your address at jrallisonfans at yahoo dot com and I'll send you your book.

And for another chance to win an ARC of My Double Life, supposedly one is being given away on the goodreads.com giveaway page. (I myself haven't figured out how to get to the giveaway page so I haven't actually checked this out, but hopefully it's there.)

Another book give-away

Laura Lofgreen,one of my blogging friends, just did an interview with me that is up on her blog:

http://mydeartrash.blogspot.com/2010/02/janette-rallison-young-adult-author.html

I think all of my followers should read it, because I can actually be insightful and witty when given questions I can write out and then revise. In real life, not so much. In real life, I can never think of the word I want and half of my sentences end with the phrase, " . . . you know, that, um, thing . . .(insert wild hand gesture to emphasize my point)"

So in order to entice you to read the interview, I'll give away a book (I'll let you choose which)to one person who leaves a comment on my blog about something they learned about me on Laura's blog. (No fair asking for My Double Life though, because I don't have copies of it yet.)

And the winners are . . .

After my husband read my rejection contest blog, he stared at the screen and said, "Wow, those stories are really depressing."

Exactly. Welcome to my life. And yet at the same time I think we all have the right to congratulate ourselves, ladies--and you too Ms., I mean, Mr. Jensen. We're tough. We take this and keep trying. Really, you all deserve good things in life for pursuing your love of writing. I wish I could send you all books and boxes of chocolates and warm hugs.

The mighty Random Oracle over at Random.org chose Noble Standing as the winner, but I'm also going to send a book to Danyelle Ferguson, who showed us that getting a bad publisher is worse than getting no publisher at all--be careful when you accept a contract. Don't be so eager to see your book published that you accept a bad contract. It isn't worth it.

I have a friend who writes romances and was so excited to get a contract for her first book and the one dollar royalty she would make off of each book--until after she signed the contract and found out that the publisher's average print run for their books was about a hundred books. Yep, then she realized she'd make about a hundred dollars for all of her work. How much do you suppose that is an hour?

I'm also sending a book to Tiffany Dominguez. 72 queries and 4 requests for fulls on a book that already has an interested editor? There but for the grace of George Nicholson at Sterling Lord, go I.

So winners, send me your snail mail address at jrallisonfans at yahoo dot com so I can send out the books.

And I'll be giving away another book at my next blog, so be sure to try, try, try again!

Rejection Contest

My daughter worked at Putnam going through the slush pile a few summers back. She told people her official job title was: Dream Crusher.

A lot of agents could also put this on their business cards.

During my recent agent-quest, I only got one form rejection--which would seem pretty good until you realize that I had a manuscript an editor wanted (The sequel for My Fair Godmother) which was in need of a contract. In my query letters, I mentioned this fact. It's the equivalent of telling agents: Hey, you get guaranteed payment for signing me as a client.

I still got rejected. Heck, I still got agents that didn't even bother to reply with a polite, "No Thanks."

But due to the last post, I've heard a lot from other writers about their rejections. My favorite is from a very talented author who had an agent email her a form rejection while he was simultaneously watching Avatar. (She knew because she was following him on twitter.) That's got to make you feel special. The agent considered your life work during the slow parts of a movie. (If only the author had thrown in a kick-butt, anorexic looking, blue alien, she might have gotten farther with her manuscript.)

In my book, How to Take the Ex Out of Ex-boyfriend, rejection letters play a pivotal part in the plot. (This is why authors are sick; we take our traumatic moments and put them in books to make money off of them.) So leave a comment telling me your worst rejection moment and the random number generator will choose who gets a free copy of the book.

See, sometimes rejection pays off.

The writer and self-esteem

Since My Double Life is coming out in three months, I've written a lot of emails to my editor, Tim, AKA the bow-tied one, about marketing stuff. (I want to hold some sort of celebrity look-alike contest, but more about that later.)

The bow-tied one didn't answer my emails for like, two months straight.

I admit right off that I'm a worrier. When I was first married, I had to have many talks with my husband about unexpectedly coming home late from work. My imagination kicked in at twenty minutes. By thirty minutes, I was planning his tearful funeral and trying to figure out how I would rebuild my shattered life. You just can't do that to a woman for very many days in the week.

Thank goodness for cell phones. Now I can call him when he's late. He doesn't pick up, but at least this way I can stop worrying about any demise that would also involve the vaporization of his cell phone.

I was okay at first when I didn't hear from Tim. I just figured he didn't want to talk marketing. But about the time that second month rolled around I started creating scenarios. Putnam was dropping me. He'd been fired. He was mad at me. He had cancer. The whole company was dissolving.

He finally called. I told him about my dropping me-fired-mad-cancer-company dissolving thoughts. "You shouldn't worry me like that," I told him. "Writers have vivid imaginations."

"Yeah," he said. "Vivid imaginations and low self-esteems. It's a deadly combination."

"Low self-esteem?" I repeated a bit aghast. "Nobody has ever told me I have low self-esteem."

"Well, they're not going to say it to your face," he said.

Apparently they wouldn't, but he would. This is just one more editorial service the bow-tied one offers.

I've thought about that conversation a lot lately. I don't think I have low self-esteem. Sure, I know I'm far from perfect. I could do a blog of all my faults. Heck, I could do a blog of all the things I've lost lately, and it would be a hefty list. (My Garmin, my car keys, my temper, the time.)

But that's one of the nice things about being a writer. I don't beat myself up over, say, being terminally disorganized. I just tell myself: I'm an artist. We're supposed to be different.

In general, I'm pretty happy with myself and life. I'll tell you my secret. I try not to concentrate on my achievements (which I think would depress anybody). Instead I aim for a clean conscience. It's amazing how awful I feel when I know I've done something wrong. I can't feel good about myself until I've at least tried to set it right. But when my conscience is clean, I like myself.

So I really wondered about Tim's comment about self-esteem. Did I have a poor self-esteem and I just didn't know it? Did everybody out there think a lot more of themselves than I did, and I'd just never noticed? Why was he so sure I had low self-esteem?

Then I left my old agent and went out into the harsh, cold cyber world to find a new one. Suddenly the writers and low self-esteem comment made sense. We're a bunch of people who pour our hearts into creating a story that we love. We not only do our utmost to create a nearly living breathing thing (at least it lives and breathes for us) but we quite literally put a slice of our mind and soul out there for people to judge.

And so many people find our best lacking. So many people find our souls not even worthy of their time.

What normal person could go through that repeatedly and not feel the pangs of a stabbed ego? Ditto for those revision comments that editors throw around like confetti at a Mardi Gras parade.

A normal person wouldn't subject themselves to this sort of treatment. Which leads me to believe that writers don't have low self-esteems. We're the ones with high self-esteems or we would have fled this business at the first rejection letter. Or the twelfth. Or the fiftieth. And certainly by that 1,000 revision comment. (My Double Life had 1,200)

Thankfully, I wasn't agentless for long. But to all of you in the trenches: hang in there, and hang on to those self-esteems. You're going to need them later.

The oddities of Amazon . . .

I admit there are a lot of things to love about Amazon. It's a great way to find all of those older books that your local book store doesn't carry. But I'm not a big fan of all the used & new books from other sellers that pop up any time you search for an author's books. If you buy one of the 53 used copies that show up on the book's release day, the author doesn't get any royalties from the sale. Plus I'm nearly positive that those copies that appear on the release day are review copies that were sent to reviewers for free. It just seems wrong for reviewers to then turn around and make a buck at the author's expense.

But I didn't mean to blog about that.

Here is the weird thing about those sale prices for books that are out of print. They can get bizarrely expensive. Someone just sent me a link to one of my out of print books, Time Riders.

Now, the problem with this book is that it had no editing done to it. In fact, the publisher inserted mistakes into the text. I never would have let Cedar Fort print the book if I had known this was going to happen, because it is really, really embarrassing. Not only are words missing and occasionally it's unclear who is speaking, but during the story, the date changes by decades. At the climax the heroine's hands are tied behind her back, then she's grasping at her captor's arms, then her hands are mysteriously tied behind her back again.

Yeah, it would have been nice if an editor caught that.

I was glad when the book went out of print.

But you can buy a used copy of the book on Amazon for a mere 900.00. In fact, you can buy two for that price. The new ones are a bargain at only 230.00.

http://www.amazon.com/Time-Riders-Sierra-St-James/dp/1555177646

I wish there was a way I could put a note next to those figures. For 900.00 I would personally read any interested buyer a version without the mistakes.

In which Janette begs for romance--wait, will that title get me blocked in filters?

When I was a teenager I used to love to read romances. Seriously, I was a Harlequin addict. I thought men were supposed to be tall, dark, and brooding. Now I have stacks of YA books to read (have to keep current on the genre) and a stack of books my friends have written (because my friends are cool) and, oh yeah, I’m supposed to be writing books not reading them.

Still, I love romance. I miss romance. I don’t read contemporary romances because most of them are hot enough that they singe your eyebrows right off when you read them. But the other day I wanted a nice, mindless romance. A hot guy and witty banter.

A couple of months ago I picked up an inspirational romance. There was plenty of inspiration, a lot of information about the shipping industry, but no discernible romance. I don’t think the characters ever kissed. They just went out and helped the poor then decided to get married at the end.

I felt cheated.

The next time I picked up a regency romance. (Not yours, Sarah Eden, this was before I got a stash of yours.) I figured it wouldn't be too steamy in the regency era as they had chaperons and what not. (I know, I know, stop laughing at me.)

I’m not sure how steamy it was because I had to stop reading before I got that far. The writing was bad but the writer made up for it by throwing in lots of exclamation points. After saving the heroine from the advances of another man, we read:
The duke’s eyes softened for a moment then regained their habitual gallantry. (Really? Whose point of view are we in? If we’re in hers—and we must be because he can’t see his own eyes, how does she know they’re habitually gallant? She’s just met him.)

She asks, “You know my name, sir?”

And he says, “Indeed I do, fair creature! May I lead you in?”

Fair creature? Did men ever talk that way? I’m imagining my husband coming home from work and saying, “How was the day, fair creature?” Nope. It just doesn’t work in dialogue.

So I figure I can't just pick up any old romance book. I'm either too picky or too prudish for them. Still, eventually I'll be done the sequel to My Fair Godmother. (I'm about 3/4 the way done and I'm supposed to be done by next week.) I'll want a romance. In fact, I'll want many. Tell me your favorite.

Manatees, Barbara and otherwise

Nicole, one of my intrepid fans, has asked me a couple of times to mention the plight of manatees in my blog. It isn't really a writing-young-adult-fiction sort of topic, since I have never written or read a book about manatees. (Hmmm . . . that might be a possible plot idea . . .)

So why am I going to do it anyway?

Because I am a sucker for animals. This is easily evident from the pack of stray felines who have taken up residence in my yard, and who I keep feeding even though I know full well that by doing so I have become the neighborhood's token Crazy Cat Lady. I can't help myself. They are furry and cute and stare at me through the glass door, patiently waiting for me to come out with catfood. How can you not feed something that's doing that?

But nobody else ask me to do something like this or my blog will become one long pitch for endangered animals. And we already have that. It's called the National Geographic. My husband insists on a subscription but I hardly read it because it just depresses me. It's like: Gee, which ecosystem is the world destroying this month?

But in the spirit of love for manatees, (who I'm sure would stare at me through my kitchen door if they could) I'm posting Nicole's link and my favorite manatee song. (There are so many to choose from.) If you don't have time to watch the whole thing then just watch from 2:30

Ahh, the wisdom of tomatoes.


http://www.savethemanatee.org/default.html

On the eve of the Newbery announcement . . .

This song is for me and all the other authors in the world. Just listen to the words and you'll get what I'm humming to myself . . .

The Wisdom of Authors

I love hanging out with other writers. It feels so validating. (I'm not crazy, I'm just a writer.) YallaPalooza was lots of fun because I got to meet old friends and new authors--and I also picked up some great quotes I thought I'd pass along to the rest of you who may be inflicted with a writing addiction.

"Every revision, you have to make the guy hotter."--Angela Morrison

"The first two chapters of any first draft generally need to be cut."--Aprilynne Pike

"I've worked out a Ninja Replacement Score for novels. It's basically the number of characters that need to be replaced by ninjas to make the book good."--Janni Lee Simner (I did not ask her what my score was.)

And last but not least on the subject of being an author, Carol Snow said, "It beats having a real job."So true, so true.

Here's a picture of me, Janni and Aprilynne--the fairy girls.

YAllapalooza 2010!

You know how every once in awhile I do an event and then I beg followers to show up so I don't look like a loser? Well, I'm not doing that this time, because I know this event is so cool you'll all willing want to go without me begging. Look at all of the awesome authors that will be converging on Changing Hands next Saturday. (And yes, authors do indeed converge, just like SWAT teams.)

Tween & Teen Event - Yallapalooza!
Start: January 9, 2010 - 4:00pm -7:00

Changing Hands Bookstore
6428 S McClintock Dr
Tempe, Arizona 85283


Changing Hands Bookstore and Hoodlums Music and Movies present YAllapalooza 2010, a literary musical extravaganza featuring live bands, pizza, games, prizes, and a chance to mix and mingle with your favorite YA authors and get books signed! We’ll have a live game show that tests contestants’ knowledge of young adult and middle grade literature with games GUARANTEED to amaze and amuse.

Los Angeles authors include Cecil Castellucci, Carol Snow, Blake Nelson, Andrew Smith, Mark London Williams, and Amy Goldman Koss.

Arizona authors include Janette Rallison, James A. Owen, Angela Morrison, Janni Lee Simner, Tom Leveen, Tony Carrillo, Aprilynne Pike, and Jon Lewis. Bands to be announced.

Also, those of you who went to Project Book Babe last April will want to read the Book Babe's thank you to the many people who supported her during her cancer treatment. The news is good and she's done with treatment! Yay Faith!

Here is a link to her blog:

projectbookbabe.com/faith

Yay! I won!

Thanks guys, Just One Wish won the reader's choice for best cover.

I feel oddly popular. Take that, all those girls who were cheerleaders while I was in junior high!

Why You Shouldn't Trust Contests . . .

You know how you're always being urged to choose you're favorite singer, dancer, whatever?

It's a totally unreliable way to determine which item is best, because you just know that said singer, dancer, whoever, is begging all of their friends to vote for them.

Just like I'm going to ask all of you to go to:

http://ldspublisher.blogspot.com/

and vote for Just One Wish in their best cover contest. (Hey, I made it to the finals without even voting for my own cover.) Of course, I would never ask you to vote for my cover if you didn't think it was best, but I'll point out that Just One Wish has sparkles in the dandelions. It sparkles. Sort of like an ultra hot vampire on a sunny day. Edward would choose my cover . . .

Why books make the best presents

Books make great presents. And I'm not just saying that because the paperback version of My Fair Godmother came out yesterday.


Years ago my sister told me the secret to happy children on Christmas morning. You can't just buy them stuff, you have to give them something to do after they're done unwrapping things. If they're bored, they'll whine and think they didn't get anything.

So this year I'm giving lots of books. Fiction, non-fiction, and comic books (Pearls Before Swine--my favorite is pig).

Today my middle daughter and her brother were arguing over the computer. "Let me have it today," middle daughter said. "I won't be using it at all on Christmas."

Score.

And the winner is . . .

Random.org in all of its glorious randomness has chosen Lauren. So Lauren, send me your address and I'll send you your book.

Merry Christmas everybody!

Book give-away and one of my most memorable holidays

I did a Christmas blog and book give-away for another blog and figured, hey, I should do the same thing here on my blog. After all, I'm going to have to go to the post office one way or the other. (Note to self: next year don't do give-aways during the holiday season.)

I have plenty of nice Christmas memories: The time a bus full of strangers all sang Christmas carols together for no other reason than it was Christmas Eve. The time my family delivered Christmas presents to a family in need. After we left the presents on the porch and doorbell ditched the house, we watched their little children come outside and search the sky for Santa Claus. I’ve forgotten most of the presents I received over the years, but I remember laying in the living room every year, lights off, just enjoying the glow of the Christmas tree.

Perhaps my most memorable Christmas is the one that happened after my mother died of cancer. I was about six. I say about, because I don’t know the date my mother died. I remember the day. It was a Saturday morning, but I can’t tell you what time of year it was. I’ve purposely not asked and not looked at any documents that would tell me. It’s not an anniversary I want to note on the calendar every year.

Some months later the holiday season rolled around, but my father said we weren’t going to have a Christmas tree that year. He just couldn’t do a big Christmas. I can imagine how overwhelmed he felt, alone with four children to raise—and in all likelihood he was angry at God for taking his wife. At least, I would be. Still, at six years old, I had perfect faith that we would have a Christmas tree. Christmas trees were part of Christmas, and Christmas was coming.

We did end up getting a tree. I remember, perfectly preserved the way some memories are, the pastor of our church showing up at our house and taking the tree inside. “I know what you said about not getting a tree this year,” he told my father. “But I had to bring one. If it’s okay, I’ll set it up.”

How could my father say no? Four children were suddenly jumping around the living room with glee. Or at least I was.

We got presents too. Once a night, sometimes twice, the doorbell rang and a stack of presents would be on our doorstep. We never caught anyone, but we figured it was members of the church.

It wasn’t that we were poor. My father could afford to buy us the presents that we wanted. But it was still a Christmas miracle. Because it meant people remembered, that they were thinking of us, that they cared.

This year I’m super busy. I’m behind on a writing deadline, my husband is out of town, and I have five kids to shop for. The dishes in the sink never end, the library books are overdue, and it’s been so long since my dog had a haircut that she looks like the abominable snow dog. It would be easy for me to rush through this season, but I think this quote from Dieter F. Uchtdorf sums it up: In the end, the number of prayers we say may contribute to our happiness, but the number of prayers we answer may be of even greater importance.

This year, be the answer to someone’s prayers.

Merry Christmas!

I'm giving away a copy of How To Take the Ex Out of Ex-boyfriend because it's a book about giving too. Leave a comment and I'll enter you, be sure to say if you're a follower and you'll get two chances.

And if you feel lucky, literary girls are also giving away one of my books over at http://literarygirls.blogspot.com/

And the winner is . . .

Today the random number generator chose LucindaF. Probably because LucindaF is so cool. (It's just like me to put words in the random generator's mouth.) So Lucinda, let me know your address at jrallisonfans at yahoo dot com and I'll send out your book.

Everyone else, don't fret, I'm going to give away a book next blog too.

Just One Wish give-away

Guess who just got a book trailer for Just One Wish? Yes, that's right, Andie my intrepid Rent-a-Teenager has done it again. In honor of the book trailer, I'll be giving away a copy of the book. Get it now while the background is blue--when it goes to paperback, Putnam is changing all of that blue stuff to pink. I don't know why. Perhaps the lips are now blowing dandelions at sunset. Mine is not to question the bow-tied one's decisions.



If you want a chance to win, leave a comment about something you liked in the book trailer. And let me know if you're a follower, because despite what your mother told you in junior high about being a follower, it does pay off here. You'll get double chances. Good luck!

Songs You Hate to Love

There are some songs that I'm embarrassed that I like. Since I only infrequently shy away from embarrassing myself on this blog, I will come right out and tell you. Yes, I like Lady Gaga’s Poker Face. I’m not going to buy it, mind you. I still have some pride and I make it a policy not to buy music from people who consider themselves royalty. (No Prince songs. No Queen Latifah.) Plus I can’t buy songs that have painfully stupid music videos. One day, I swear, I’m going to start my own blog just mocking bad music videos. It will be called, The Lighting Guys Might Have Told You that You Looked Great, But They laughed Themselves Silly While You Were In Wardrobe Changing Out Of Your Spandex Mini Skirt And The Shirt That Looked Like It Was Made of Mouse Pads And Held Together With Packaging Tape.

Poker Face fails both the royalty and bad music video tests, so I just have to listen to the song on youtube with the window minimized and hope that my love of the song will run its course like that unfortunate infatuation I had with Britney Spear’s Womanizer. (Although come to think about it, I still shout out: You say I’m crazy? I got your crazy! every once in awhile.)


But even though I minimize, I’ve still gotten bits and pieces of the Poker Face video. And here is my question. Who brought Lady Gaga a swimsuit with shoulder pads and gloves and said, “This will look great!” Because that person should have to wear Bjork’s swan dress for a solid week just for penance.

Anyway, as I was watching the swimsuit, and going: Wow, it looks like part of someone’s tick-tac-toe game came to life, I thought to myself, “Haven’t I seen that outfit before?” I was pretty sure Lady Gaga was just recycling through old Star Trek costumes. So I googled Star Trek Women. (And yes, this is the sort of thing I do when I really should be working on my novel.) I found this:


Actually, it looks better than Lady Gaga’s swimsuit.
While I googled, I also found these Star Trek inspirational photos and laughed so hard I had to post them. Those of you in my generation will understand.
(http://echosphere.net/star_trek_insp/star_trek_insp.html)

Julie Wright, a dangerous woman

One of the funnest parts of being a writer is getting to hang out with other authors, so I was especially looking forward to having my good friends Julie Wright and Josi Kilpack come down to Arizona to do book signings. Having them stay at my house—total slumber party.

There was only one little problem. Before they came I managed to give myself a head wound and a black eye. I won’t go into the details of how this happened as it is a long boring story except for the part that makes me look really foolish, but the moral of the story is: No, I don’t have night vision.

Really, it is easier to give yourself a black eye than you’d think.

So I warned Julie and Josi that I looked like a homeless person (It’s hard to wash your hair when you’ve smeared antibiotic ointment on your hairline) and planned on skipping out on their signings. But they were also speaking to a book club and invited me to come—in fact, they invited me to speak at it with them. How could I turn it down?

I hoped people would think I was going for the slightly greasy hair look, then caked on the foundation. It did a pretty good job hiding the bruise.

Josi spoke, I spoke, and then Julie spoke. But Julie gave one of those really moving talks about the books that turned her life around when she was young. It wasn’t long before I was crying. Which wouldn’t have been a bad thing at all except that I knew crying would wash away my foundation and suddenly reveal to everybody there that I was hiding a black eye.

How do you explain that to a roomful of strangers? “Oh, and by the way folks, in case you were wondering--my husband doesn’t really doesn’t beat me!”

This is why you shouldn’t go listen to Julie Wright if you need to keep your makeup in place.

Faerie Festival, in which I almost get wings

I promised I'd post pictures of myself from the Faerie Festival. Here is the outfit my amazing friend, Kristy, sewed for me. She is sort of like Martha Stewart but more impressive because she has seven children. One Halloween she sewed herself a Snow White costume and then sewed matching dwarfs outfits for all of her kids. I'd like to see Martha haul seven kids around the neighborhood without losing any. But I digress.

This is why the festival was so fun--cool authors to hang out with! This was one of the few author events I've been to where I was actually friends with all of the authors (and the booksellers) before I got there, so it felt like a party. Here I am with Aprilynne Pike, Janni Simner, James Owens, and Brandi from Changing Hands Bookstore.
And here I am doing a reading from My Fair Godmother. You can tell I'm an autumn fairy because I'm wearing brown and all the grass around me is mysteriously dead. This is why autumn fairies don't get invited to many social events.

Winners!

Mimilee and Bchild, your numbers are up. But in a good way. Send me your real addresses at jrallisonfans at yahoo dot com and I'll send your ARCs out.

All the rest, do not despair. Hopefully I'll pick up some more ARCs before May.

Oh, and no fair letting everybody know how the book ends. (Like any of my books end without the girl getting the hot guy. I mean, what kind of novel would it be if that didn't happen?)

My Double Life ARC give-away

I feel bad for making anybody who is just dying to read my next book (I know that's all of you, right?) wait any longer for the promised ARCs, so I'm doing the giveaway now--but if you didn't read about the Faerie Festival then you have to read that blog too, as I'm once again trying to convince conference people that I have fans. So if you can go to the festival, please do. And when you see me, yell out, "There's Janette Rallison, who is not my neighbor! I'm just a random rabid fan, of which there are many in any given crowd!"

Okay, that said, I thought I'd do a blog about the cover for My Double Life.

My idea for the cover was to show the back of a singer holding a mike, but with her fingers crossed. Thus conveying that she is lying. I admit it was sort of vague, but the Bow-Tied One likes to see my cover ideas so he can ignore them. I sent him my daughter modeling for this:



And this was one of the covers they sent me. I thought it was nice.


But they decided to hire a model and insert her into the cover. I do like the fact that they hired a model for the cover since that means I will not see this same picture pop up in a million adds like the picture for My Fair Godmother has. And she's very pretty. However, does anybody think this model looks at all Latina? Yeah, I didn't think so either. Apparently the photo shoot department doesn't actually read the book.


I'll be giving away two ARCs. If you want a chance to win just leave a comment telling me which of my previous books was your favorite. Followers get double chances. Good luck!

Faerie Festival

Next Saturday I'll be at the Fairy Festival. (Or if you're highbrow it's: Faerie) You, like me, might not have even known that the faeries all got together once a year to have a festival, but they do. I'll be there with other cool fairy/faerie authors: Aprilynne Pike (Wings) Janni Simner (Bones of Faerie) and James Owen (Here There Be Dragons)--all of whom I know and like! I'll be wandering around at 10:00 buying Fairy stuff but I believe the Author stuff starts at 12:00. (If not, someone needs to come find me and pry me away from the Fairy artwork booths.)

One of my friends is even going to sew my fairy clothes. How nice is that? I need to put her in a book dedication or something. (And yes, I will take pictures.) Here's the official info if you want to come:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saturday November 14th

Estrella Park in Goodyear

14805 West Vineyard Avenue (in the NAVY area)

10am-9:30pm (IMPORTANT NOTE: No Admittance or Re admittance onto the event grounds after 7pm)

Parking "Estrella Park Fees" $6 per car load

Event Tickets Only $10 ea ages 5 & Under FREE

No pets please

Lawn Chairs and Blankets Welcome

Creative Costumes Encouraged

No outside food or beverage

Come celebrate the folklore and fantasy, mystery and magic of the Faerie Realms with Food and Fun,

The Random Number Generator has spoken

I picture it like that scary green floating head in the Wizard of Oz, but maybe that's just me. Anyway, today the random number generator likes Chelly and Kristi Stevens. Don't get creeped out about that or anything.

So, Chelly and Kristi email me your home address at jrallisonfans at yahoo dot com, and Ben Bella will send you your books.

The rest of you, don't despair. Because I just got a couple of ARCs for My Double Life and I and my good buddy Mr. Floating Head Number Generator will be giving those away next blog.