Monday, July 12, 2010

Celebrity Fashion

I've always been grateful that authors don't count as real celebrities, since there is some unwritten law that celebrities have to frequently dress like expensive clowns. I mean, really, what was Rihanna thinking when she bought this outfit? And for that matter, what was the fashion designer thinking when s/he designed it?

I'm imagining some drunk guy with a fake European accent saying, "At last, I have created the perfect blend between water-wings and dice!"

Or how about anything Lady Gaga wears. This for example:
The perfect blend of a life jacket and a disco ball.

But recently it has occurred to me that the reason that celebrities dress this way is so that people will plaster their photos around. Hey, it's free advertising. In this spirit, I'm beginning to think that I should dress like a celebrity at all upcoming author functions. So what do you think I'd look better in this:

Or this:

Maybe I'll just save myself time and wrap a roll of tin foil around my body.

11 comments:

Valerie Ipson said...

YIKES! That's all I can say.

Julie said...

This cracked me up. I vote for the last photo.

Heather Dixon said...

I think you should try the Lady Gaga outfit. She looks like a retro hunchback. It's daring!

Juju at Tales of Whimsy.com said...

Yowzers!

All awful.

My first thought on Rhianna's outfit: "It's like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man has a cousin."

Jennifer J. said...

No, no, you must have a flotation (floatation?) device. I would recommend a cross between an animal print and shiny, and maybe make the animal print a color that is not found in nature.

Yes, I could be an author stylist!

Sara B. Larson said...

oh come on, you know you like those outfits a little bit. Ha ha, jk!! ;)

Botterfly Girl said...

Celebrities complain about wanting to be treated like a normal person, and then they walk around like that....

Chelsea DeVries said...

This post was beyond hilarious! I vote for the last outfit. I believe that's Ke$ha. She's out there but that's what makes her unique. :)

Krista said...

But I was going to wear that first dress to the Whitney Gala next year... *pout*

Melinda said...

Why not wear both? That gold dress is awesome, but the woman's legs are screaming, "what about me?" The leggings would complete the outfit perfectly. Wear it to the next ANWA meeting, though, just so we can make sure.

Laura Lofgreen said...

I'm a sucker for great fashion, but this doesn't count. Yuck.
Plus, I like my name-brand fashion for cheap.